fourteen more days until i am in the same room as them
fourteen more days until i am watching their soundcheck
fourteen more days until zayn sees me, falls in love with me, and decides he wants to marry me (okay just joking)
fourteen more days until i may potentially die (not joking at all because i may hyperventilate like when i met the jonas brothers and omg i might lose all my breath just staring at one direction in person)
I know I’m not the most accepting of the whole situation, but it’s not because I just want to be. I actually have a reason. And that reason is because I just want what’s best for you, like how you want what’s best for me. I don’t want you to have to settle for something less than you deserve.
One of my dream jobs is to work as a face character at Disneyland. It would combine two of my favorite things: Disney and interacting with little kids.
The audition process is quite time-consuming and tedious, however, and they only get paid a little over $10-14 an hour. I’m not sure if I’m witty enough to even be a face character (hats off to Andrew Ducote for being the best Spieling Peter Pan ever), but it’s always something I’ve wanted to do.
Do you ever regret agreeing to be Issac's girlfriend?
Isaac* haha. But no, I really don’t regret it. In fact, it’s one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I don’t like talking about my past, but I came from some relationships where I was cheated on and played and just plain used. But with Isaac, I know that he’s in it for the long run. I tell him all the time that he’s the best, and sometimes I don’t think he believes it. He really is, though. I don’t think he understands that he’s really helped me up from where i used to be.
You just have great expectations of a person to do something for you because, you know, in some cases they are obligated to fulfill the task (i.e. your parents). I think that’s why I don’t really keep my expectations up, because a lot of the time I just get disappointed in the end. And that’s happened to me a lot.
F all the men who can’t treat their lady with respect. If she does everything for you while you sit on your ass doing nothing at all, don’t think you have the right to talk to her like you’re some top-notch, first-class male. Watch your words. You’d think that an adult such as yourself would have the proper mannerisms to be polite and not be ignorant.
Today I went to Oak Hill funeral home to attend a viewing for my mom’s uncle, Jimmy. As I was looking at the program and pictures outside of the chapel, I had realized that Jimmy’s wife had written something in a vacant space of the photo collage. She wrote,
"Hi honey, I love you and will miss you so much. I will never replace you in my heart." ♥ B.F.F.
I thought that was the cutest, yet saddest thing I have ever seen. After I paid my respects, my family and I sat down inside the chapel. We overheard Jimmy’s wife saying, “I will miss him so much. Every day since he got back from the military, there was never a day that we were separated. Now I have to learn to live my life without him.”
Your eyes meet mine and I realize that these are the moments that are perfect. With everything else going on in our lives, all it takes for me to be sane again is to be with you. You accept me with all my unwanted attitudes and genuinely love every part of me. That’s why I will never let you go. I completely love you so so so much.
Too many thoughts on my mind right now. I’m stressed to the max and everyone just thinks I’m having a bad attitude about everything. But little do they know, I have a lot on my plate, and sometimes it really isn’t easy for me.